It's been awhile. . .

It's been awhile since I've posted and this post is going to deal with the joys and struggles of being an Auntie.

A week or so ago I had the opportunity to walk with a niece through the heartache of losing a boyfriend. What was really hard for me to hear was just how much she wanted to be loved. How much she was willing to take all the blame on her. How much she was willing to beg to be taken back. It seared my heart and I ache for her and I still ache for her to know just how valuable and worthwhile she is in herself to God.

Yesterday I got to be around a family while they worked over a family health crisis. I was able to watch one of my niece's step in to help and pass it on - the "auntiness" that I have shown her which was passed on to me by Sharon Livingston. God really uses people. It's nice to know that the grace that was passed on to me by Sharon. . .that I passed on to the niece. . .that she passes on. . .can be somewhat of a heritage.

Psalms and Songs

Dearest - the weekend was relaxing and a time to reflect.

I was thinking about King David in quiet times last night. He wrote fantastic psalms and songs. As I sing my own praise songs to You, I think how stupid people may think it is. Yet, I think back to a shepherd boy with his sheep - camping out singing praises to his creator. You led him from pastures to Goliath.

His songs of praise soothed a king's trouble soul. As he ran from the same king - my mind takes me to him, once again, camping outside. Fearing for his life, hiding in caves, he offered praise. He had a lot of friends and help with him, but ultimately, what mattered most was his relationship with You. Battered down, hiding and protected under the shelter of Your wing - he sang songs of praise, fear and despondency. He was honest and open with his words.

Thank you for examples from long ago - that encourage me to offer up my prayers and praise. For tonight's study - open my hears and heart to understand words from across the table. Set a guard over my lips. Draw us out to be courageous and open. Prepare our way to make the study sweet and inviting. Love, Me

Quiet Prayers 2/27/2009

To my Beloved - the weekend is coming up. So many people with needs - two retreats and a friend melting down.

With ears tuned to Your Spirit, I ask You to let me know how to pray, how to speak and what actions are required.

Thank you for longer days - for bright sunshine one day after snow. As we walk through this day, let me dance for you with You. It's nice to be with and enjoy your company.

For this weekend coming up, give me courage to speak truth kindly and honorably. Don't let me forget how kind and loving You've been to/with me as I struggled through dark days. Let me be your hands, feet and mouth as I walk through hard dark days with family and friends.

I love you and look forward to our weekend - Me.

Pursuing God

It's been awhile since I've posted. Mostly because the stuff I write down is a bit mundane. But, I felt the Spirit of God calling me to spend time with my Sophomore in high school niece. She's having a tough time with her faith.

We got to spend some time together - and I realized that teens have many things to deal with. There's lots of drama and confusion in their thinking. If (with the help of God) I'm able to stay connected with her through her thought processes God and I may have something to help her through this time in her life.

So we talked about recording kissing from the King (you know those kisses that God gives you just to bless you?) And then we talked about recording those things that people tell you. Those things people just dump on you because you listen - and then they really don't want to hear your issues. The question she's struggling with is how to just turn them over to God and not work on fixing them.

And then we talked about a High School Retreat. The question - was -why did it not fulfill your expectations. The response was - that when she went looking for God - pursuing Him - she didn't find Him. He didn't speak to her.

Ironically - several years ago, Pastor Alan recommended a book: "Furious Pursuit - Why God will Never Let You Go" - along with the work book. She and I talked about it last night - and together we're going to go through the study - taking our time. The book is really a 12 week study. When Iwent through it the first time, it took over a year. We will take as much time as we want.

God is amazing to have spoken to me through this book - and then passing it on to a teenager who is struggling. Isn't He awesome!

Cold - It's very cold

Out here in Gresham on the border of Troutdale - it's very very cold tonight. The east wind is up - and with blowing snow - it looks like a blizzard.

I think it's time to go wrap up in a blanket, get the cat - and drink some decaf coffee with candles and flashlights near by.

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Interesting week

It's been an interesting week or so. I took the train to Seattle for work. It was amazing - AMAZING - to sit in the "viewing" car - and watch the sunset over the trees in the back hills on the way from Portland to Seattle. Then we came up upon trees and the ocean. You know what! God certainly makes things awesome.

Tuesday night - arriving back in Portland late - I ran over some construction on the middle of an intersection. I thought they cleaned up afterwards! But I wound up with two nails in my one tire. Fortunately, the way they were situated, no air escaped. The tire just made a horrible clattering noise all the way home. Les Schwab fixed the tire the next day.

My cat, Tut, had been having accidents around the house. Now to know Tut is to love Tut - but accidents are not to be loved. If you raise your voice to Tut - he is crushed. He will go into a pout . . . such a sensitive cat. So before I raised my voice at Tut (or papered my house with pampers) I decided it was time for a vet visit to see if he had issues.

Turns out the guy had issues. He had a bladder stone like an arrowhead. Yeah - Saturday night was emergency surgery for the guy. Got him back home after a several day stay at the hospital - with the vet telling me - don't let him chew his stitches. The first day that wasn't a problem. But the second night - I'm sleeping - and I hear him gnawing on his stiches at 4am. Like an idiot I yell at him to stop. And. . .we're into the pout behind the couch. So at 4am I'm digging him out from behind the couch - assuring him that he's still a good cat.

The vet and I had a discussion and now Tut is wearing an Elizabethan collar which he hates. But he's not chewing on those very expensive stitches!

Happy Birthday

Today was my birthday and I had a great day. Went out to lunch and then to a movie with a fantastic friend. Then came home and was able to just relax for the rest of the day.

It was awesome to get to speak with my sister and her family. I am so looking forward to seeing them next May. It also appears that one of my adopted nephews will be getting married next June in Atlanta. It looks as though I will be doing some traveling in May and June.

Today the long dry spell in Oregon was over. We had a torrential downpour that occurred about 20 minutes after I had lugged watering cans out on the balcony and watered all the plant. Hmm. . .good thing I didn't wash the car.

Women's Bible Study is going to be on Romans. I'm back with the same small group leader I had for the first two years at church. I'm excited to be able to be back in her group - if I couldn't have the same leader I had last year.

Well, it's time to go to bed (after retrieving a cat who is chasing an imaginary bug around the house) - and be grateful to God for another year in helping me grow to be more like Him.